Lauren smiles.

His Dark Materials and other nerdy music!

2009-09-19T22:03:00.002-04:00

Ever since this whole wizard rock thing started and I've been blessed to meet incredible people and travel to a ton of new places, I've wanted to make music with as many people as possible. There are so many talented musicians in this community and I'm so happy to call them my friends. I'm also pretty freaking ecstatic to call one of them my boyfriend.

Matt and I have worked on music together before. Back when he was recording his newest full-length album, Demons at the Helm, I contributed some harmonies and backup vocals to a few songs that needed something. At that point, I think we realized that we compliment each other's musical styles and talents pretty well, and we've been tossing around ideas for a collaboration project ever since. We both wanted a reason to write cute, nerdy music that isn't necessarily about Harry Potter. I also wanted an excuse to play ukulele in a band, so I'm going to be playing it on pretty much every song while Matt plays acoustic guitar.

Today, we posted the first two songs for our new side project, a band called Armoured Bearcub. If you get the reference, you'll be happy to know that one of the songs we've posted is based on an event in Philip Pullman's His Dark Materials, specifically, The Subtle Knife. In "Lee Scoresby's Last Stand", Matt sings from Lee's perspective and I'm singing as his hare dæmon, Hester. We're very excited for people to hear this song.

The other song we posted is a bit less heavy. "Let's Get Our Masters Degrees In Love" focuses on a lighthearted account of our reasons for not continuing our education past a Bachelor's Degree (at least, not yet).

Since we've already had a complaint about our decision to host this music on MySpace until we make some music videos for YouTube or finish a full album and put it on iTunes, I just set up a Facebook page for the band. On there, you can get all kinds of updates on what we've been working on, including future music videos that we'll be putting on YouTube and a forum where you can have discussions about our music! We're still waiting for them to verify the page so we can post our music on there though, so if you want to hear it, you'll have to go to MySpace for a few minutes. I'm sorry.

We'd love for you guys to follow the MySpace and the Facebook page, and we can't wait to get more songs finished so we can share them with you on those pages! You can find them here:

http://www.myspace.com/armouredbearcub
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Armoured-Bearcub/147876982864

Please let us know what you think about the music on those pages! Like I said, we can't wait for you guys to hear this stuff and we're so excited to write more songs and work on music videos for them. Yaayyy!

Motivational Issues.

2009-09-14T22:53:00.003-04:00

My first two weeks of school weren't terribly awful. This semester, my weeks are super short. They essentially feel like three very packed days, followed by a four-day weekend. The arrangement is pretty nice, except that I am much less likely to get work done early because I feel like I'm on break all the time. I'm sure it doesn't help that I've started the weekend trips, but they keep me sane so I'm not likely to slow them down anytime soon.

On Thursday, I got out of a full day of back-to-back classes and jumped in the car for a seven or eight hour drive to Rhode Island. As always, being with Matt makes everything better, even though I knew I'd have to do the drive backwards and immediately go to class once it was over. Time with him is always worth whatever I have to do to make it happen. I'm really freaking excited that I finally got to see the dæmons play live, and I drove back here last night and this morning feeling very inspired to write again. I really needed the change of scenery, to see Matt before he goes on tour for a month and a half, and the reminder that I can go some places and feel like I belong there.

Rhode Island has seriously grown on me since I started spending more time there with Matt. I love the people and the food and aside from needing to deal with Connecticut traffic, I don't even mind driving there anymore. Saturday night, I ran up to give Brad a hug when he got to the party and he said, "Welcome home." It's really heartwarming how a relatively new place can just feel like home, even if you've only visited for a few weeks. Being at Etown still doesn't give me that feeling, so it's especially nice when I get to experience it in the middle of the semester.

I'm only going to be here for the next three days, so hopefully I'll get all of my reading done without getting too cranky. I'm kind of worried about how it's getting more and more difficult for me to force myself to do everything far enough ahead of time to get in reading responses and study for unnecessarily frequent quizzes on the chapters. I am very close to being done with college and I know I can do it, but now that I've decided not to continue or try for a job in Psychology yet, it's becoming a lot tougher to get all of this work done.

On the bright side, I picked up a ton of mail today and put the new art up on my wall. If I'm lost for reasons to keep smiling this semester, you guys and the things you've sent me will definitely point me in the right direction. I'm trying to figure out the best way to make a video about all of this art, and I don't know if I should wait a bit before I do that. I definitely want to find a clever way to share this with you guys though, because it's one of the coolest things ever having a wall covered with cards that people all over the world decorated and sent to me. Thank you again for doing this for me. :)

I am now approaching the part of the night where I am thinking about how great it would be to go to sleep, but unfortunately, I have another textbook chapter, some Psychology articles, and an outline for a presentation I have to give on Thursday to work on.

Wall Art!

2009-09-05T21:14:00.003-04:00

Earlier this week, I posted a video asking people to make 4" x 6" index card-sized pieces of art for me to put on my dorm wall/YouTube backdrop. Today, I got up and went to the post office in town to see if any submissions had come in yet! At first, they said that the box was empty and that my new keys had not come in yet (I applied and paid for the box a week ago, and they told me to come back for the keys since the ones they had were not working). So I left, and about two minutes later, I got a phone call saying that they found my mail. If for some reason any of you guys get your mail returned, please let me know because they didn't put it in my box, they just put a rubber band around all of my mail and left the pile on a table in the back somewhere. Apparently, they think my box is vacant. Thanks, Etown post office. Everyone here is extremely well-organized and on top of things, as usual.

However, the things I received made me so freaking happy that it doesn't matter and I don't even mind that I probably have to go back there to figure out why they aren't putting my mail in my box. You guys sent me beautiful, funny, creative, and just really awesome pieces of art and I loved looking through each of your little packages and envelopes. I'm seriously just blown away by how creative and generous you guys are, and I'm honored to have your art on my wall.

I didn't just end up with index cards either; most of them came with really genuine, heartfelt letters. It makes me so incredibly happy to know that I've made you guys happy, and I wanted to thank all of you from the bottom of my heart... not only for working on these cards, but also for supporting me over the years. You guys are the reason why I keep doing this stuff, and I really, really appreciate every single one of you, whether you have all my CDs and see all of my shows and leave comments on everything or you just quietly listen and enjoy what I do. You're all amazing people, and I'm so glad that I'm finally getting to see the kinds of fantastic things you guys can do.

Thank you Holly, Kiera, Nalts (yes, I fangirled his submission for a minute or two), Liz, Rachel, Sarah S, Sarah R, Maddy, Kara, Jason, Daniel, anyone who only put their names on the backs of their cards (which are already attached to my wall) and anyone who has sent or is working on or is thinking about working on one of these cards for me. It's only been five days since I posted the video with this idea and I already have over 20 decorated index cards and a box full of absolutely gorgeous photography that Daniel sent me. I can't wait to go back in a few days to see what else is in my PO box by then! I'm going to be accepting these until my PO box expires after this semester, so don't worry! I have plenty of wall space left!

You guys have made my life at college better, whether you're contributing to my wall or listening to my music or commenting on my videos or even leaving me messages here on my blog. And I know that people like thekatbc are "disgusted" by the fact that college depresses me and I blog about things that depress me sometimes, but so many more of you actually understand and have been there for me when I'm down. I intended for this blog to be a place where I can vent and be who I am and express myself, and almost all of you have made me feel like I can do that. So thank you. :)

I am on fire.

2009-09-04T20:37:00.008-04:00

The following is a completely spoiler-free exercise in attempting to explain how I feel immediately after finishing the sequel to Suzanne Collins' The Hunger Games, Catching Fire. However, I cannot be responsible for what might happen in the comments. There is my disclaimer.

I seriously feel like I'm being ripped apart from the inside. These books eat my soul in a very, very good way. Just like with the first one, I had extreme difficulty putting the second book down for more than an hour or so in which I had to force myself to eat and pee. I also got to the point where there were so many twists and turns that were tossed to me so quickly, I had to literally cover the page ahead of me with my hand to keep from jumping ahead and spoiling myself. I cannot get that final line out of my head and I can't stop thinking about what just happened, what is happening, what is coming next. It all goes so quickly and when you reach that final page, your race to find out every little detail is ripped out of your hands and dangled just out of your reach until the third book is released (supposedly, sometime in 2010). I kind of have this weird urge to stare blankly at the wall ahead of me and just let the reality (well, fantasy) of what just happened wash over me. Devouring these books feels every bit as real and threatening as truly being in that world would be. Ten minutes ago, I caught myself reopening the last pages to make sure that the words I'm seeing, hearing, and feeling over and over in my mind actually have come from a book and not from an intense disaster I've personally witnessed. I can actually feel what this book has done to me, and I like it.

Since I want to give you guys a bit more time to get your hands on this book and finish it before I discuss actual plot details, I think that I'm going to stop there. Please read these books if this seems like something you would enjoy too. They probably won't take you very long, because I have yet to find someone who can successfully stay away from the remaining unread pages whenever you leave to take a break. I don't think I'm exaggerating when I say that they will seriously change your life.

Do Not Want.

2009-08-28T12:53:00.003-04:00

This always happens whenever I have to make a conscious effort to move myself and my things back to Etown. I don't do it earlier because I don't want to go. I end up late and rushing. I end up forgetting things. I end up tired and sweaty after I had just taken a shower because I end up moving everything into my car by myself. I end up crying the whole ride back.

Matt rented a car and is driving all the way here to follow me all the way there, help me move in, and then sit in a hotel room by himself while I spend several hours rehearsing, sound checking, waiting to perform, and then performing with Vocalign. I wish I could spend a little more time with him, especially with everything he's done to be there with me and make me feel a little less awful about having to go back.

Whine whine whine whine whine. My life is so difficult. My parents pay for college and I complain to them and everyone else about it all the freaking time because I don't like being there.

All I want is for this year to be a little bit less awful than the past three so I can get through it without being too miserable. Is that so much to ask?

Really Long Summer Blog.

2009-08-23T12:46:00.004-04:00

One interesting thing I've noticed over the past few years is that the meaning of summer has completely changed for me since high school. Before, summer meant a break from work. It meant that I could stay up late, hang out with friends or go shopping during the day, and go on vacation with my family. Now, summer has become the time that I can do the work I've wanted to do all year, but couldn't because I was stuck at college doing work I didn't want to do. I actually get to do my job full-time in the summer, and I enjoy every minute of it, even though it keeps me very busy.

LeakyCon started out my summer and it was an absolute blast. However, I was constantly doing something and that exhausted me quite a bit. I was up early every morning, fighting to get a lunch break, and going to bed as soon as the concerts were done at the end of the night. I was really super careful not to lose my voice because we were almost the last band of the conference and I had to make sure that I could still sing by then. I only partied one night, and that only lasted until about 2am. If you've been to one of these conferences, where all-nighters are almost expected of you, you know how unheard of that is.

Luckily, the rest paid off because I was leaving on tour two days later with some of my best friends ever. I had the time of my life on tour this summer. It was a lot of hard work, and I almost never noticed that because I loved it so much. There was a whole lot of driving, very little sleep, a lot of taking vitamin C and trying to stay healthy, and almost no internet involved. And I would definitely, hands down, do this every day if I could.

Unfortunately, I came home to a few health issues included a really horrific backache that made it really difficult to sit down and provided constant, intense pain for about four weeks. I went to the chiropractor a lot, saw a scoliosis specialist in NYC, discovered that getting an MRI is nowhere near as much fun as riding in a spaceship might be, and now I feel better but I'm not really sure how long that will last. I also had some pretty annoying gum surgery to build up and strengthen the gum tissue that had worn away for some reason. The procedure itself wasn't unbearable and only required ice and rest for about a day. I spent twenty days with rubber packing bandages covering the left side of my mouth to keep the stitches safe, and that made eating difficult, but it wasn't so bad. In a few months when I've fully recovered, they're going to do it again to the right side of my mouth. Hooray!

After the Half-Blood Prince release, I headed off to San Francisco for my first west coast wizard rock experience. Even though the people in charge of Azkatraz thought that it would be fun to toss me around for several months before and during the conference, I wanted to be there to support my friends and have some fun. I sold merch for Matt during his shows and in the vendor room, which ended up being fun because I got to meet a ton of awesome people. It made me really happy how many people were asking where my merch was or if I would be playing a show there. I had never actually been invited to play, but I had been told ahead of time that I was a backup plan in case one of the other bands dropped out. This ended up being some kind of mistake or a lie, because when that band did drop out, I was not actually asked to play.

Once I was in California, a second band dropped out and a few of my friends had texted me to see if I would step in and play that night. I figured that it was kind of suspicious that the people in charge still hadn't tried to ask me themselves, so I said no. I wasn't interested in being thrown around anymore. One of my friends finally convinced me to say yes and I decided to play, if only for the fantastic people I'd met all weekend who wanted to see me perform. Unfortunately, by the time I finally tracked down the person who was in charge of booking the show I'd been asked to play, it was clear that she was only interested in basking in the glory of her stand-in performance in Lena's Wrock Opera and didn't really care at all about finding a band to fill in for dropout #2. After being told to just set up in a corner somewhere and do whatever I want (as she shrugged me away with a wave of her hand and went off to enjoy her newfound fame), I had a bit of an uncontrollably Myrtle-like sobfest in front of a little crowd of really amazing people who had gathered when they saw me lugging around a guitar and trying to figure out where I was supposed to be playing. I felt bad letting them down, but at that point, I was really not in the mood to play a set. It would be really nice if all conference staffers were as respectful and organized as the ones in charge of LeakyCon.

Luckily, this happened fairly early in the conference so I was able to calm myself down and have fun for the rest of the trip. I hadn't seen Matt for over a month before going out to San Francisco, and I really loved spending time with some of the friends I don't get to talk to as often, like Rosi, Emma, Melissa, and Sarah. I also enjoyed meeting and hanging out with StarKidPotter, the masterminds behind A Very Potter Musical. Azkatraz was a fantastic example of how Harry Potter conferences can make any bad situation so much easier to handle because there are so many amazing, caring people around to take care of you when something goes wrong.

Last weekend, I drove out to Ohio with Nina to see our friends, Sarah and Graham, get married. This marked the first friend wedding I'd ever been to, and I cried quite a bit during the ceremony and even during the toasts at the reception. It was absolutely beautiful and I'm so happy that I got to be there. I also really needed and loved the Hayley-time. She is one of my favorite people in the whole world.

Aside from the month I spent in my bed at home trying to sleep through the back pain while Matt was on tour and Nina was in Poland, I haven't been home very much this summer. I've spent most of my time off staying with Matt in Rhode Island, which has been really nice. We do a lot of similar things in our downtime, so it's been really nice working on my laptop, eating good food, reading books, making YouTube videos, and watching movies with someone other than just myself.

The funny thing is, I used to spend summer getting ready for school to start. Now, I spend the school year getting ready for summer to start. And here I am, about to begin my senior year of college. I was definitely able to rest this summer, so hopefully I won't get back to school and crash immediately like I did last year. Starting next May, I'll be able to do all of this full-time. I wouldn't have it any other way, except maybe to have it a little sooner.

Making a website.

2009-08-11T10:03:00.001-04:00

So here’s a scenario for you.

You’re an independent musician focusing on internet promotion to get your music and other projects out there. After around four years, you’ve accumulated a bit of media attention and some really awesome fans, many of whom have become some of your greatest friends. You can’t play very many shows yet because you’re still in college, but you spend every free moment you have trying to spread the word about the performances you do manage to line up. Eventually, you get to play the show in, say, Winner, SD (and it’s awesome). Immediately upon returning home, you check your YouTube messages and right on top is one that looks like this:

Subject: Your Biggest Fan!
Dear Lauren,
I love your music so much. I have all your CDs and they are constantly on repeat in my car. My ultimate dream is to see you play a live show. Why don’t you ever come to Winner, SD?

jnrfdgoffseosfkdfsdkdsfjj (In case you were wondering, that is the result of your head banging into your keyboard because your diligent promotion managed to escape the attention of your biggest fan and you really have no idea when you’ll have the money to visit Winner, SD again)

Today (well, yesterday when I wrote this), I’ve decided that I’m actually going to put together a comprehensive website that covers all of the various music and internet projects I’ve started over the past few years. I bought a brand new 13” MacBook Pro about a week ago, so I’ve been playing with iWeb pretty much all day. I seem to have given up trying to do something creative and I'm just going with their cookie cutter layouts until I figure out how to do something else, but we'll see how long that lasts. I’m not sure where I’m going to host this or which domain name to buy or if I’ll even finish the website before I get distracted and start another project, but it’s a start.

I realize that I’m probably going to be linking to this site on all of my other various methods of internet expression for a long time before people even consider coming here first for updates, but we’ll see how it goes. If I can reach one more fan that would have missed a show update otherwise, then it’s worth a try.

Geography fail?

2009-07-30T13:23:00.004-04:00

I'm going back to college for my senior year in a little under a month. I'm not particularly excited about it, especially because this summer was an awesome preview for what I'll be doing full-time once I graduate, but there isn't much I can do about it. One thing I am looking forward to, however, is moving into a quad on campus with three of the most awesome people ever, living right next door to like three sets of amazing people who I don't see often enough. I've been trying to figure out the best way to transport myself from the quads to the rest of the campus where I'll be eating and going to class, because walking will take a while and driving (and then parking) will be obnoxious and less than environmentally friendly.

And then I ordered a Xootr Roma folding kick scooter. Hooray! I kind of can't wait to reinforce my reputation on campus as that weird singing Harry Potter nerd girl, since I'll probably be getting even more confused looks than usual as I fly past people on what looks kind of like an over-sized child's toy.

It is apparently still supposed to come in the mail today in Rhode Island, though I seriously doubt it. Even though it started off in Taylor, PA two days ago, when I woke up this morning, the tracking website was updated to say that it is now at a post office in Hodgkins, IL. It went almost twelve hours in the wrong direction. I guess that could be a bug in the system and it might actually be on the truck for delivery like it should be right now, but I emailed them just in case. Hopefully they'll get back to me because I don't really want someone else to get my new toy dropped on his or her doorstep. The amusing part is that it still says it's right on schedule for delivery today.

I know Rhode Island is small, UPS, but even though you have to look extra hard to find it on a map, you should probably actually figure out where it is before you try to send something there. Nerd-girl needs her scooter.

Update: I guess they realized that they screwed up. Delivery has been rescheduled for August 4th instead. Not cool, UPS. Not cool.

Finally, some new music.

2009-06-28T21:57:00.003-04:00

Hey, remember that time I updated a blog? Remember that time I had almost no internet time on tour, so I was planning on updating a bunch once I got back? Well, my excuse for not doing that will hopefully not be so terrible.

As soon as Nina and I got home from the most amazing three weeks on the road, we got right to work on our new EP! If you didn't know this already, we were asked to be part of the Wizard Rock EP of the Month Club for 2009! You should check it out and subscribe if you haven't already. We had less than two weeks to finish August's EP in order to get it in on time, but it ended up working out and I'm really happy with the end product! It was really stressful and caused quite a few headaches, especially for Nina who had to do most of the work, but I'm glad we made it happen.

A while ago, I had an idea to do an album completely a cappella. That's right... no instruments, just voices. Unfortunately, we didn't have enough ideas left over for Myrtle and the concept was a little too much of an undertaking for a full album. Then, Paul approached us about doing an EP (or a short album!) for the club and we knew we could make it happen. I'm hoping to get one or two of the tracks up on MySpace or YouTube so you guys can hear some of the crazy things we recorded. There's even a rap on it featuring the vocal stylings of Tom Riddle, also known as our friend Zack.

If you subscribe to the club, you'll get our 'Bathroom Acoustics' EP in the mail. The only other way to get it is to come to one of our shows once we receive our copies of it in the mail, but we'll only have a limited amount.

And that is why I've been too distracted and exhausted to post in this blog.

I've started reading Hard-Boiled Wonderland and the End of the World by Haruki Murakami. I still have no clue what's going on, but I like reading it. Matt says it will get even better once I figure out what's happening.

On another note, I'm playing a show in Parsippany, NJ tomorrow by myself and I am pretty freaking nervous. Granted, I haven't really promoted the show or practiced for it, so that would be an appropriate emotion in this case. Please come? And RSVP on Facebook? Who knows... I might even make some of this week's Tuesday video at the show, since I've also been neglecting fiveawesomegirls and now I finally have the time and internet access that I've needed to get back into vlogging.

I love you all.

New Camera!

2009-06-26T15:47:00.002-04:00

IMG_0018
Originally uploaded by laurensmiles

When I got home from tour, I decided to get the Canon Rebel T1i I'd been eyeing for a little while. I love how great the photos look, even though I've only figured out the autofocus modes so far. Luckily, I have some downtime at home for the rest of the summer so I can learn how to do everything else on this camera. Maybe I'll even post an HD video recorded with this guy soon. I'm pretty excited about it!

I love touring.

2009-06-05T10:44:00.003-04:00

Right now, I'm sitting in the nicest Super 8 Motel in existence with four of the most amazing people. We're about to check out and get on the road from Indianapolis to St. Louis for our show later tonight. I just realized that I haven't blogged in too long, so even though I only have about ten minutes before we're leaving, I wanted to try to squeeze in an update.

Tour has been incredible so far. I love this group of people so much and I'm having an absolute blast! Luckily, even though I lost my voice after a ridiculously busy LeakyCon with only a two day break before tour, I've been able to keep singing. We're starting to get the hang of playing a lot of shows in a row, which Nina and I haven't been able to do since the summer that book seven was released. It's really great getting to meet so many people who live far away and being able to play in new places!

So far, the biggest surprise of the trip was in Akron, Ohio where we were given a beautiful auditorium with a fantastic sound person. We ended up with an audience of around 150 people, most of which had never even heard of wizard rock. People laughed at our jokes again!

I should probably get ready to check out of the hotel, but I'm throwing in one last point before I go. For a little while, I've been considering buying an entry-level DSLR camera. I love my three-year-old Canon PowerShot, but I'm really not happy with the pictures it takes indoors anymore. I've been admiring the photos a bunch of my friends have taken, especially with Canon Rebels, and I have my eye on the HD video setting on the Canon Rebel T1i. I know that once my Dell laptop craps out on me, my hard drive camcorder won't translate well to a Mac, which I'm planning on switching to, and having a nice digital camera with a high quality video option would be awesome. I'm not worried about making the switch to DSLR... I love gadgets and learning how to use all of their features. Have any of you guys tried the T1i or anything in the Canon Rebel line? Would you recommend it for me?

Excitement!

2009-05-18T23:16:00.003-04:00

I spent the past eleven days in Rhode Island, staying with Matt in his new apartment. Eleven days, you ask? How did that happen? Well, we pretty much looked at my schedule, decided that I had eleven free days in a row before I needed to come home and get ready for LeakyCon, hypothetically considered the possibility that I could stay for all of them, and then it happen. And it went by very quickly. And now I feel kind of lonely.

Luckily, this plan left me with almost no downtime at home and therefore, I will definitely be distracted. I have a pretty amazing couple of weeks coming up and I am so freaking excited about it.

Tomorrow, Nina is coming over for two hours to run through songs for LeakyCon and consider any last-minute fun plans for our set. The really exciting part, aside from getting to see Nina's adorable new haircut and cartilege piercing, is that the sealed box sitting just inside my door and containing the newest member of the Myrtles family will be opened, plugged in, and played for the first time. We'd been saving up for a really nice digital stage piano that might end our piano-related issues with live shows, and I can't wait to start using this guy.

Wednesday, I'm getting up early and going to NYC with my grandma to get a really nice haircut. I haven't cut it since last August, when I got a straight-across bob cut that would end the crooked weirdness of what my short haircut looked like grown out. I've always struggled with my hair and while it was fun having less of it and being able to straighten it quickly, I miss my curly hair. So I got an appointment at the Ouidad salon in NYC.

Apparently she's a pretty big deal... everything I've researched online has pointed me to her website. Between the carve-and-slice haircut and her products, I'm hoping that I can actually grow my hair long after this. My curls tend to grow out sideways and not down, so I end up cutting it again by the time it finally gets some length to it. What I hear is that this salon will show me how to make my hair healthier and easier to deal with, which would be fantastic. We'll see how it goes. Before and After photos will definitely be coming, and I'll get to show it off at LeakyCon as well. Yay!

I'm also really excited for everything happening at LeakyCon... I'm going to be so busy but I can't wait and I miss everyone so much! And then I have a two-day break followed by an incredible three-week tour with my best friends. Nina's coming on tour now, which makes me super happy because I haven't been able to spend very much time with her lately, since we're both so busy. I'm going to try to take a ton of pictures and videos as well. I've been terrible with that stuff lately. This will need to be documented.

Pretty much, my summer is going to be amazing. And that's not even half of it.

Goodbye, Posters.

2009-05-03T13:25:00.005-04:00

All day, I've been packing up my room and taking down the stuff on my walls. This would be a tedious and kind of sad process if I weren't so eager to get out of here and get my summer started.

I really enjoy covering my walls with faces I love and bright colors, but I'm not going to lie. It annoys me just a little bit that I get so many comments on my videos that have nothing to do with anything I've said or the music I've played, but that are just from people saying that they like my posters. I mean... I work on a solo CD for months and you choose to comment that you like V For Vendetta or that Natalie Portman's bald head scares you (it's hot, okay?). This hasn't happened until I put movie posters on my walls either. Luckily, with every new year I get a new dorm room and a clean slate to make my own (and in the case of last year's roommonster situation, I got to do this twice).

And so I put forth a challenge. I refuse to let the white cinder block walls show for my senior year... this place is enough of a prison as it is. But I would love to spend the summer taking new photos and collecting new things that I can put up on my walls for senior year so I don't have to put the movie posters back up (at least, not where the camera can see them anyway). I feel like my backdrops over the years have given a nice edge to my videos and while I don't want it to be distracting, I think it would be really fun to make next year's walls a collaborative project.

I would love to make this some kind of art collage, but I'm not exactly sure what to do with it. I'm thinking that I could accept 4x6" horizontal index card submissions with magazine clippings, photos, song lyrics, drawings, letters, and other fun little colorful things attached to them and get some kind of P.O. box for people to send them into. Would you guys be interested in creating a piece or two of my YouTube backdrop for the upcoming school year? Do you have any other ideas for things I could do to decorate? We have all summer and I know you guys are creative. This could be awesome.

In other news, I'm going home tomorrow!

Sick.

2009-04-29T22:35:00.004-04:00

Today, I woke up with two swollen eyes. I looked in the mirror, did not recognize myself, freaked out a little, then decided against going to class. I made myself an icepack out of a ziploc bag and a washcloth and some ice, covered my face with it, and got back in bed. I didn't get up again until later tonight when I had to walk across campus to watch Casablanca for class, and then spend two hours feeling like I was going to pass out on stage for a very long Vocalign rehearsal.

Today sucked.

Finally.

2009-04-27T16:56:00.002-04:00

This morning, I was finally able to go to mail services and get my Nintendo DS Lite! I am so freaking excited and I'm pretty sure it was worth waiting for the apple green one to come all the way from Hong Kong. The only annoying thing was that, since they don't make this color in the US, it came with a European charger. Luckily, our tiny Kmart had an American one! So now I'm good to go.

I've been playing Pokemon Platinum preeetty much all day. This is a bad plan because I am going to be busy all week and I have a ton of work to do, but I'll deal. Also, I'm only one gym badge into the game, but so far the plot is pretty much His Dark Materials. Evil group of people using the energy from evolving Pokemon to blast into a new universe? Sounds like the Gobblers to me.

I also bought Super Mario 64 DS, but I haven't touched it yet. I'm trying to track down Professor Layton and the Curious Village as well, since I've heard that it's a lot of fun. I freaking love this thing.

La Vie Boheme

2009-04-21T22:59:00.004-04:00

Despite posting a fiveawesomegirls video six hours ago that never processed, I had a fantastic night. I was part of the HPA conference call live on ustream because I've recently been announced as the new Hufflepuff head of house! I am so freaking excited to get more involved with the HPA.

My personal favorite moment was when I suddenly decided that it was a good idea to start singing songs from Rent because Evanna Lynch mentioned that she loves it. She asked me to keep going once I stopped and then she sang along with me. I felt pretty freaking cool. Evanna is awesome.

So now my video is reuploading and I'm hoping that I don't have to stay up too late waiting for it to process. Thanks, YouTube.

Google is fun.

2009-04-20T23:00:00.004-04:00

Okay, I'll admit it. I search for myself on Google when I get bored.

One of the really hilarious things about being moderately well-known by people on the internet is that you hear amusing rumors about yourself and you can never really be sure where they got that idea from. Here's a gem I dug up that I found on an American Idol forum dedicated to voting for the worst person on the show at any given time:

"Does anyone remember Lauren Fairweather? I think she was Season 5, and she auditioned in Boston. At that time she was a 16-year-old from Hillsborough, NJ. Apparently, Randy REALLY didn't like her, so I don't think she made it to Hollywood. Currently though, she's 1/5 of the YouTube hit fiveawesomegirls, and has recorded 2 albums with her band, The Moaning Myrtles (they sing about Harry Potter) and 2 solo albums. She's signed to DFTBA Records. Don't you think it would have been awesome if she made it to the voting rounds? I mean, a Harry Potter nutjob in the Top 24 would have been a VFTW Victory ! Could someone dig up her audition? I don't know if it was even on the show, but she said in one of her YouTube videos that Randy Jackson really hated her voice."

1. I never auditioned for the judges. I got rejected at the first round where you sing in front of one of like 20 random producers lined up on the football field and they don't even have TV cameras around yet. I don't know where this person heard that Randy Jackson hated me either considering that I never even sang for him. And since when does Randy ever say anything besides "Dawg dawg dawg I'm feelin ya dawg" or "Dawg not your best dawg"?
2. I'm not signed to DFTBA Records either? I've been releasing albums for years before they even existed. I also got the impression that they were founded to help talented songwriting YouTubers release albums if they don't have the funding or materials to do so themselves, and I don't exactly fall into that category since I've been doing this myself since 2005.

People are hilarious.

Residence Life

2009-04-15T20:53:00.000-04:00

I had a little bit of a crisis this week. It's bad enough that what ended up being my schedule next semester is going to be a complete nightmare for me to get through when I come back here in August, but the process of housing selection was worse.

We had already been approved for an Independent Living Unit on campus next year, but at least one of us needed to go in last night with our lottery numbers and pick the living space we wanted. Since Suzanne had to work, Katie and I went with her suggestions for which quad to pick. And which quad not to pick.

Almost all of the quads on campus are set up the same way, with a big living room and kitchen downstairs while the bedrooms and bathroom are upstairs. Apparently there are also a couple that are only one-story, with another set of kids living upstairs. None of us wanted one of those, if we could help it, but we did not know which ones were laid out like that so we figured that we would ask the housing people when we went up to pick our quad. So we did, and the woman in charge of housing told Katie that E-1 was not one of these quads we were avoiding. And we picked it.

Later, I found out from a [nice, but very loud] guy that he was living in the quad above us. This came as a shock to me, since the director of housing said that the one we picked had two stories. There wasn't supposed to be ANYONE living above us. I was not happy and neither were my suitemates when I told them that Residence Life lied to our faces and now we're in the worst quad living downstairs from guys who, while they're really awesome, have already apologized because they're going to be making a lot of noise on our ceiling.

It turns out that the woman in charge of housing didn't realize that E-1 was the one we had specifically asked not to have. Granted, she was immediately defensive about her position and her knowledge when we came in to let her know that she had wronged us and we were not okay with that. She tried to convince us that we had the wrong information and still refused to admit that this quad was any different from the others. Until one of the other staff members came over to inform her that she was, in fact, incorrect.

Luckily, she had to keep one quad open for someone and we were able to switch to A-2 instead. Sometimes, things work out. That still doesn't change that I spent most of last night really upset because I had been lied to and I was convinced that I'd be stuck with an awful living situation for my senior year.

I'm just done with this. I don't want to deal with this school anymore. I just have to force myself through one more year of this crap and I can finally go on with my life.

Impulse Buys.

2009-04-06T22:46:00.000-04:00

Today was alright. My lab got cancelled and I wore my bear hat outside for the first time ever. It didn't get quite the overwhelming response I was expecting, though I did get a few weird looks and a text message from a friend who saw me out a window and needed to inform me of the awesomeness of my hat. Sometimes I think my college just isn't ready for someone at my level of ridiculousness.

Now that I'm thinking about it, this school has kind of gotten used to the idea of me over the years. When I first got here and people demanded interesting facts about me upon meeting them, I brought out the wizard rock stuff and ended up needing to explain what that was. These people usually left with confused looks on their faces, but eventually thought nothing of it because they figured it wasn't a big deal anyway. Now, if I ever bring up wizard rock or Harry Potter in conversation, I get an "oh, you're THAT girl" or another similar response.

I did spend most of the day pretty angry and upset, though. As much as you think you can expect certain things from certain people, their actions can still surprise you.

Me: I hate that I feel ill when things upset me. Why can't I just react like a normal person?
Matt: Cause you're a hufflepuff, dear.

Luckily, I had saved the purchase of a Nintendo DS Lite for just this sort of occasion and found myself an apple green one, which they don't sell in the US. I love the internet. It's kind of pathetic how I can sometimes be cheered up by material objects that I buy for myself, but it works. I take a weird sort of pleasure in waiting to buy something I've wanted for a while until I need the pick-me-up. And now I just get to wait for it to ship from China. Pokemon Platinum, here I come!

I love the fandom.

2009-04-05T18:15:00.000-04:00

Today I reached 500 YouTube favorites again so I went through all my old ones and watched them, to see which I should take off the list to make room for more.

I discovered two things. The first was that I noticed a pretty upsetting amount of videos on that list that had been removed from YouTube or changed to private. This kinda made me sad because I had added them because they included an adventure I had with one of my other friends on YouTube. I understand that a lot of them probably included crazy dancing to uncopyrighted music and that when you become a YouTube partner, you kind of have to privatize or remove those. I mean, I still have the memories I guess. I just like going back and watching those when I miss people and now they're gone.

The other thing I discovered (well, not really) is that I freaking love this fandom. I haven't seen everyone in a while and I know I've got to wait for the summer, but I went back and watched videos from 2007 when everyone was meeting Jo Rowling and Deathly Hallows came out. We are so freaking lucky to have each other and it's sad that some people have either removed themselves from the fandom or can't bring themselves to empty their bank accounts to see everyone anymore.

I was feeling really freaking inspired and I wanted to put together a video reminiscing about some of the incredible times we've had together, so I tried to write a song that I could use for some kind of montage. Unfortunately, I've been having trouble with songwriting lately and all I managed to get out were some lyrics for part of a verse and a bridge. Hopefully I'll go back to it eventually.

Just... if you've ever been part of a show audience or attended a conference with me or been there to make any of these events over the past few years amazing, thank you. I love you all.

Friends in Drag

2009-04-04T17:33:00.001-04:00

Last night, I got to witness one of the most awesome things I've seen on this campus since I started going here three years ago. Allies planned a Drag Show and it was freaking amazing. I mean, you can't really go wrong with a bunch of guys dressed as girls and girls dressed as guys lip-syncing to things like "Single Ladies" and "Pretty Fly for a White Guy".

Not even touching on how entertaining and fun the show was, I was just so happy to see an audience that was so accepting and nonjudgmental. Especially here, where I've chosen to hide in my dorm room on my laptop for entire weekends instead of going out. I couldn't wipe the grin off my face all night.

On two unrelated notes, Flowers in the Kitchen is the best place to eat ever and YouTube is taking an excessively long time to process the new video I made today.

Weekends

2009-04-03T14:16:00.000-04:00

This morning, I drove back to college for the weekend.

Wait a second... that doesn't make any sense. Usually, I'm the one leaving every weekend to go home or to a wizard rock show or basically anywhere but here because I need to get away.

Anyway, here I am. I don't even have much in the way of plans, but at least I'll get to bum around and catch up on reading. I finally saw Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist and considering that I've had the book on my shelf for a few months, I might attempt to read through it.

I really should've just emailed in the paper that was due today and stayed home.

Excuses.

2009-04-02T18:17:00.000-04:00

On Sunday afternoon, my stepmom called to tell me that her father died peacefully in his sleep. This news is difficult enough to deal with, but I've spent all week stressing myself out so I could attend the funeral and be here for my family. You'd think that wouldn't be too much to ask.

Unfortunately, I knew that missing my Wednesday film screening was bad news because that would give me a day and a half to track down an obscure German film, watch it, and write a paper on it that needs to be handed in on Friday morning. Judy seemed to be okay with me missing the wake so I could stay at school to see the film and then driving home immediately after.

Then, I tried to contact all of my professors for Thursday classes in order to reschedule exams and such. I knew I'd be losing credit in dance class because if I'm not dancing, I'm not going to be graded as if I were. My gender studies professor was the only one to express any kind of sympathy, and even though I was able to move the physics exam I'd be missing, the only time I could make it up was on Wednesday.

That gave me almost no time to study, considering that my Physics professor did not even tell us what the exam was on until Tuesday afternoon. Thankfully, I got to see Matt on Tuesday night, since he had just left for tour and I'm halfway to North Carolina. He calmed me down and cheered me up even though I had to work on notecards with facts about general relativity while he was there. And then I woke up early, studied some more, fell asleep, went to class, and kicked that physucks exam's ass.

I finally got home late last night to find a total of eleven cars parked in my driveway and in the woods across the street. Relatives I've never even met before completely packed my house and took over all of the bedrooms. I shared a couch in the attic with my sister while three younger kids argued until 2am. I woke up to hear someone complaining that my sister's room was too warm. Somehow, the image of Danielle shivering up in the freezing attic on a cold leather couch wearing a winter coat and wrapped in blankets didn't allow me to forgive this woman for a) not taking the initiative to find the thermostat and b) taking my frozen sister's bedroom and clearly not being grateful at all.

Funerals and deaths in the family are bad enough, so you'd think that college professors would express some sympathy and give you a few extra days to get things done while you're home supporting your loved ones. Apparently that isn't a good enough excuse. As you can tell, I'm whining a lot about how inconvenient this all was for me. I really do feel badly that he died, and I did cry at his funeral, and I do wish that I'd gotten to know him a little better. I just wish that people were a little more forgiving in these kinds of situations.

This week has been more stressful than I'd prefer, but it's almost over and apparently I can handle it.

Six hour drives = Not so bad.

2009-03-29T17:41:00.000-04:00

I drove to Providence on Friday, spent an amazing night with Matt, had some pretty exceptional oatmeal for brunch, drove back to school on Saturday afternoon, and then sang with my a cappella group at Relay For Life at 1:30am this morning.

I am exhausted.

I am also really freaking happy.

Purple IS a taste.

2009-03-13T14:49:00.000-04:00

It’s that flavor they intend to be grape but is really kind of gross and tastes nothing like grapes. Because I love grapes and I am offended that they would make grape-flavored things so gross, I refer to that taste as purple instead.

Do grapes even come in purple? I’ve only seen red and green ones outside of cartoons.

Physics in Music

2009-03-12T18:47:00.000-04:00

I enjoy science. When I was in high school, I was seriously considering a career in biology or genetics and I was actually in a club that met after school where the especially nerdy (see also: awesome) students got together and did college-level bio labs to solve challenges and such. We watched Gattaca once. Fantastic movie.

However, that interest never really extended to Physics. This might have had something to do with the fact that my high school Physics teacher, hilarious as he was, spoke with a thick Romanian accent that took me about a semester to decode. I would blame my confusion on this, but even once I figured out what he was saying, I actually realized that it was Physics that I couldn’t understand.

So, here I am, in college and in need of a lab science. I’ve already taken (see also: failed) Neuropsychology and crawled my way through Neuroscience, but the psychology-related science class selection is pretty limited here. And that is why I was enrolled in How Things Work, a Physics class for people who don’t get science or math. Or in my case, a Physics class for people who don’t get Physics or Calculus, since I technically kick ass at most types of science and math.

Today, we began a unit on Physics in Music. I thought this would be pretty cool considering that I love music and the professor has already asked me to bring in my guitar on Tuesday. Unfortunately, this particular class period consisted entirely of a bad 1980’s educational film in which the voiceovers repeatedly mispronounce the word ‘timbre’ and proceed to simplify something as beautifully complex as music into, essentially, a picture of a wave and some numbers.

Way to make one of the most interesting concepts into a bland, impersonal, emotionless scribble, Physics.

I have blogging issues.

2009-03-11T14:41:00.000-04:00

Okay, I’ve been on like 483294 different blog websites. I used to be able to last at least like, a year or two on each. Now, I’m lucky if I post more than once every few months on any of them. I think a lot of this had to do with my favorite blogging site, GreatestJournal, self-destructing and taking all of my photos with it.

Basically, I’m just trying to find a new blogging site and I guess if I like it, I’ll continue to post on it. We’ll see how this goes.